Aggressive Hurricanes Battle for the Right to Destroy Gulf Coast Meteorologists and climate scientists are in agreement that global warming is creating more aggressive weather — …

Anti-defamation League Champions New Era of Kindness On October 21st, President Biden unknowingly flashed a white supremacist hand symbol while he was at a Town Hall …

Random Passerby Crowned “King of the Met Gala” Celebrities attending the Met Gala last weekend were surprised to see viewers choose random passerby Jim Hornbloom as …

Clown Costumes Moved to Sexy Section of Spirit Halloween Sales of clown costumes were up last Halloween, but not for the reason one would expect. With …

Nintendo Accidentally Sues Itself After Remaking its Own Game Nintendo’s legal department recently announced that they will be pressing charges against the creators of “Donkey Kong …

Acronym Creator Missing in Action Emmaline Young, Doctor of Philosophy, was recently reported Missing in Action as of Thursday, 10:39 ante meridiem. Last seen getting a …

Blue’s Clues Detective Business Fails It’s been 19 years since Blues Clues’ Steve went off to college, and is now announcing a new private detective business. …

UC Campuses Criminalize USB Drives to Combat Illicit Black Market Dealing Pandemonium swept across campus last Wednesday following the announcement prohibiting the possession of USB drives …

Pro Unreal Tournament Player Reflects on 9/11 Jerry Stern, former professional player of the Unreal Tournament titles, has reflected on the events that took place during …

Speak Softly and Carry a Big Stick: A Guide to Becoming the World’s Best Golf Caddy Horace Scope, locally-renowned golf caddy, has begun the press tour …