Tech
Film Bros Endangered Following Rise of Short-Fern Content
“Ah— ahh— ahh—” said multiple videos the film bros scrolled past.”Photo by Lilia Sanchez After the discovery of the new invasive media species Shortfernicus slopicus (common …
Man Achieves Fame and Fortune Following Nine-Paragraph-Long LinkedIn Post
“Sure, I can generate a caption for you!” produced Grok.Photo by Amit Roth Last week, newly “loaded” millionaire Michael Gates posted an extensive soliloquy on LinkedIn …
UCSD Unveils New AI Therapist
“What an interesting query — have you tried using UCSD CAPS?” generated the AI therapist.Photo by Amit Roth Following widespread student complaints about the lack of …
Stable Diffusion Kills Last Horse
A sequel Umamusume game will reportedly be based on dogfighting.Photo by Amit Roth L ast night, the World Wild- life Fund (WWF) announced that the last …
Ditto AI Pivots to Circus Industry
“I saw a giraffe with two necks and no feet,” said one visitor. Widely regarded as the source of “all those annoying posters on campus,” matchmaking service Ditto AI has decided to take advantage…
Facebook’s Metaverse Ported to the Collective Unconscious
“I tried to watch ‘The Social Network’ last week, and they deleted my occipital lobe,” said one user.Photo by Amit Roth Meta’s Metaverse, formerly known as …
Billboards in Silicon Valley ‘Go Rogue’
“Is this like a weird porn thing?” asked one concerned driver.Photo by Amit Roth The high-tech industry, quartered in California’s Silicon Valley, continues to apply AI …
San Diego Police Department Unveils New Crime Stopping Technology
“Scan it! Ssshhhh. Zap it! Zzzz. Detain it! Clank,” said one BOP IT. Photo by Amit Roth In a press conference this past Friday, SDPD Chief …
Zoom Workplace Solves Employee Work-Life Synergy
When asked for comment, many corporate executives were found unresponsive with cameras off.Photo by Justin Xu This October, Zoom Communications, Inc. plans to add “business-forward” tools …
AI-Run X Accounts Devalue Words, Pictures Now Worth 2000
“Forcing my oomfs to take the Turing Test”, said one X user.Photo by Amit Roth and Claire Cover Twitter, formally known as X, allowed users to …
