Opinion

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I Need Coding Help vs What, Like It’s Hard?

Written by: Annelise Mccullough

A person’s ability to learn a new language declines after age 12, so why am I, in my early 20s, expected to learn and become fluent …

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We’ve Got to Do Something about This Rat Problem vs There’s No Such Thing as a ‘Rat Problem’

Written by: Dylan Towner

Folks, we’ve gotta do something about this rat problem. I used to not have a problem with the rats. They were harmless at first. Sometimes, when …

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Why I Think Leprechauns Aren’t Real

Written by: Erin Yao

That dreaded time of year is now almost upon us. My first-grade class will soon insist on catching a leprechaun in time for St. Patrick’s Day. …

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I Am the Hydro Flask That Falls in Your Lecture

Written by: Beth Becker

I hear people have been complaining about the occasional, small, itty-bitty noise that I make when I fall in your 8 a.m. lecture (it’s not like …

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Disney Is a Striking Example of the Proliferation of Capitalism vs Fuck You, I’m Mickey Mouse

Written by: Cole Johnson

POINT: Disney Is a Striking Example of the Proliferation of Capitalism Back in my day, characters could only be owned by a company for about 14 …

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Read Me Like One of Your French Books

Written by: The MQ

I remember the day I was purchased like it was yesterday. I was sitting on a shelf at the store with my siblings, waiting, just waiting …

ArticlesEditorialOpinion

Please, Just Let Me Live in the Future

Written by: Amit Roth

I was born in the wrong generation. Everyone seems to have lost their minds! To let Dogecoin die? To not let Elon Musk into your brain …

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UCSD Needs to Increase Awareness of Mental Illness vs UCSD Makes Me Very Aware of My Mental Illness

Written by: Mac Carroll

POINT: UCSD Needs to Increase Awareness of Mental Illness The University of California, San Diego is ranked #21 nationally for colleges with the most depressed student …

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Technology Is So Cool. I Can’t Wait to Live In the Future! vs. Please Leave the Doctor’s Office; Your Subscription to Amazon Health Has Expired

Written by: Samuel Ramirez

POINT: Technology Is So Cool. I Can’t Wait to Live In the Future! Dudes and dudettes, brace yourselves for the upcoming awesomeness that is the future! …

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Tesla Is the Future of Accessibility vs. How Do I Open These Fucking Doors

Written by: Jordan Whitlow and Kaz Nuckowski

POINT: Tesla Is the Future of Accessibility The worst thing to happen to anybody just happened to me. I’m temporarily disabled because of a tragic bus …