Kaz Nuckowski

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Taylor Swift Overcomes Cult of Personality and Industry Monopoly to Top the Charts

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

Taylor Swift’s The Tortured Poet’s Department was met with mixed reviews from critics and broad commercial success when it debuted on April 19. “All 32 songs …

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I Can’t Believe It’s My Last Hot Girl Summer vs Thou Shalt Have No Harvest

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

POINT: I Can’t Believe It’s My Last Hot Girl Summer Five years gone. They really snuck up on me. Is this really the last summer I’ll …


Coca-Cola Unveils New Ad Campaign to Kill the Polar Bears

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

“Be the climate change you want to see in the world,” said Chief Marketing Officer Klymat Chang.Photo by Amit Roth Beverage giant Coca-Cola announced in a …

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Dear Emily Queue: Leap Day Edition

Written by: Sylvia Terry, Katie Campbell, Kaz Nuckowski, Annelise Mccullough and Amit Roth

Dear Emily Queue, if I see my shadow on Leap Day, will there be 28 more days of February?Of course not! Who do you think you …


Local Gamer Embarks on ‘Relationship Nuzlocke’ to Legalize Polyamory

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

“I’ve always been weak to normal types,” said Nico Franc.Photo by Connor Betterly Polyamory is rising in recognition and favorability among young people, but legal protections …

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Tesla Is the Future of Accessibility vs. How Do I Open These Fucking Doors

Written by: Jordan Whitlow and Kaz Nuckowski

POINT: Tesla Is the Future of Accessibility The worst thing to happen to anybody just happened to me. I’m temporarily disabled because of a tragic bus …


Psychoanalysis Wrapped — Your Top Armchair Diagnoses in 2023

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

If your day-to-day interactions with strangers were anything to go by, 2023 was a hard year for you. You exhibited 2,133 different typical behaviors that people …


I Give Up — The Next Global Disaster Will Be Too Weird to Predict

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

A decade of unprecedentedly unprecedented times, whatever people are calling it, has put me out of business. If you asked me a decade ago where we’d …


San Diego Named Least Expensive City to Live in the U.S.

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

Following a rapid decline in rent prices, San Diego fell off of the U.S. News & World Report’s list of most expensive places to live in …


Costco Begins Selling Gilded Gasoline, Celebrated by Members for ‘Unbeatable Bargain Price’

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

“Panning is so last season. Hand me the siphon,” said one Costco member.Photo by Millie You This summer, Costco began selling 1-ounce pure gold bars online. …