Surfer Crashes After Catching Wave That Was Also a Particle


Written by: Sharon Roth

Surfer Crashes After Catching Wave That Was Also a Particle

Local surfer Brad Mc- Broski reportedly suffered injuries in a surfing accident, leaving him in a state of superposition. As Mc- Broski was catching a “nuking wave,” someone on the beach measured the wave’s position, thus collapsing it into a particle. This freak event, which has only been observed in research labs, has shifted tides in the physics community.

Due to the Heineken uncertainty principle, a surfer superstition, the onlookers knew McBroski was moving very fast, but they had no idea where he was. Until paramedics found him, Mc- Broski was simultaneously alive and dead.

After McBroski was found alive, his ride to the beach and “dude in arms,” Homie Simpson described the event. “Dude. it was gnarly, it was grommin’, it was bodacious, it was schlorpin’, it was schlurpin’, it was boogie-woogie-Ebenezer- Scroogie…” Simpson continued to list adjectives for 30 minutes.

Following this “radical” event, McBroski was recruited for a study in which he was repeatedly fired at a double slit.

Graphics Editor at The MQ

Sharon was “born” in 1801. She inspired the Archie Comics, which later inspired the hit TV show Riverdale.

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