Volume 28
Geisel Renovation to Include New Crying Booths in Response to Rising Mental Health Concerns
Pitt said, “This whole time, I thought CBT stood for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Now I know it stands for Crying Booth Treatment.”Photo by Julia Wong Throughout …
Study Finds New Sixth College Students Don’t Know How Good They Have It
One spectator commented, “Wow, this feels like the third installment in a trilogy. I wonder if I could go onto TheMQ.org and find the prequels.”Photo by …
UCSD Cracks Down on Students Squatting in Unfinished Eighth College
“The swaying of the building in the night wind rocks right me to sleep,” Snak commented.Photo by Julia Wong For many universities across America, the end …
Sunny G Found Wearing CAPEs
“I’m beginning to suspect that Sunny G might be Sun God,” one student said.Photo by Julia Wong Earlier this week on Sun God lawn, Sunny G …
The U.S. to Start Broadcasting All Court Proceedings Following Popularity of Heard-Depp Trial
One attorney concluded, “I rest my case, just like I rest on this MyPillow.”Photo by Maria Dhilla Last Tuesday, the White House announced a new executive …
Snake Path Comes to Life, Eats Anyone in Its Path
“This is not like the Rainforest Cafe,” Helpani attested.Photo by Julia Wong After an intense thunderstorm over San Diego, an ancient creature previously residing within Snake …
For Local Frog, “It Ain’t Easy Being Green”
Listen. Listen! Lean in here. All the way down, buddy. You see where I live? This absolutely gorgeous miniature log cabin is my home. I live …
The Card Readers on Vending Machines Eroded My Trust in Our System
It’s 2003, and you’re sitting in the lounge of an office building that looks as if the ’90s was swallowed, trapped, and then died here. Your …
