Articles
UCSD Renames Sixth College After RuPaul
“A” letter grades have been replaced with “S”, which stands for “Serving”.Photo by Daniel Palacios-Villegas In honor of National LGBTQIA+ History Month, UC San Diego announced …
White Supremacists Now Disinterested in Valhalla
“I didn’t think Valhalla had H1-B visas,” said Burke Collins.Photo by Farhad Taraporevala White supremacist groups in the United States are reportedly distancing themselves from any …
Taylor Swift ‘Begs’ Fans to Ignore Lyrics
“Why can’t people just separate the speech from the speaker?” said Taylor Swift.Photo by The MQ Despite being considered one of the “least anticipated” releases of …
Hungry for a Simpler Life? Think Again.
Being owned by an eight year old isn’t easy, I won’t lie. Once, I was a powerful eldritch being, torturing the poor, rotten souls trapped in …
Yuri Banned
“How will this affect Gaylor?” asked one protestor.Photo by Aidan Moran To combat the “troubling threat lesbians pose to American democracy,” President Trump issued an executive …
Montana to Introduce New Congressional Maps
The final electoral map was found to be more representative than the Texas redistricting.Photo by Ezra Bihis and Amit Roth In response Proposition 50 in California …
Entity Projecting Waves of Apathy ‘Not a Big Deal,’ White House Says
“I actually voted for the entity,” said one median voter.Photo by Amit Roth At 11:56 p.m. on October 27th, an unknown entity appeared in the sky …
Walk Your Scooters! vs. But I Don’t Want To :(
Point: Walk Your Scooters! I think I speak for most of my fellow pedestrians on campus when I say that these scooters have become an issue. …
Birds To Go On Strike
“Birds of a feather strike together!” said Big Bird.Photo by Dylan Schmidt Yesterday, the American Bird Union (ABU) announced that all members will go on strike …
I’m Just a Worm in a World Full of Early Birds
Rise and shine, they tell you. Today is a new day, they croon. The early bird gets the worm, after all. Yeah, that wouldn’t be an …
