Volume 32
Entity Projecting Waves of Apathy ‘Not a Big Deal,’ White House Says
“I actually voted for the entity,” said one median voter.Photo by Amit Roth At 11:56 p.m. on October 27th, an unknown entity appeared in the sky …
Walk Your Scooters! vs. But I Don’t Want To :(
Point: Walk Your Scooters! I think I speak for most of my fellow pedestrians on campus when I say that these scooters have become an issue. …
Birds To Go On Strike
“Birds of a feather strike together!” said Big Bird.Photo by Dylan Schmidt Yesterday, the American Bird Union (ABU) announced that all members will go on strike …
I’m Just a Worm in a World Full of Early Birds
Rise and shine, they tell you. Today is a new day, they croon. The early bird gets the worm, after all. Yeah, that wouldn’t be an …
