Dylan Schmidt
Legal BAC Raised For Election Night
In anticipation of an exceptionally fraught election season, the United States Senate has announced the bipartisan passing of a bill that will raise the legal Blood …
There Is No Ethical Investing vs. Suck My Penis-Shaped NFT
POINT: There Is No Ethical Investing I’ve always been dubious about anything that’s supposedly “free.” I glare at the “free” samples at Costco and swat away …
Hell to Now Feature Ads
In a bold new update to the afterlife, Satan has announced that Hell will now include advertisements in its landscape of eternal torment. When asked to …
Las Vegas Consumed by Plague of Moths
“I was drawn to it like a moth to a… like a… like… um…” said one moth.Photo by Dylan Schmidt Only a few months after the …
Mold Is Dangerous and It Should Be the University’s Responsibility to Remove It vs. Mold Actually Makes You Smarter If You Sniff Enough of It
POINT: Mold Is Dangerous and It Should Be the University’s Responsibility to Remove It When I moved into the UC San Diego dorms, I expected to …
UCSD to Convert Individual Parking Spaces Into ‘Housing Solutions’
“When I came back from my 8 a.m. class, some asshole had parked his Prius in my living room,” complained one resident.Photo by Amit Roth UC …
