Volume 29
Horoscopes for February 8, 2023
Aquarius – Jan. 20 – Feb. 18 Happy Aquarius season! This month, your power-ups include finding pennies on the ground, never pulling a muscle at the …
Student Debt Relief to Be Distributed via Ticketmaster Verified Fan Presale
“2,000th in line? I know this pain all too well!” stated one fan.Photo by Amit Roth Last week, the U.S. Department of Education revealed that student …
Physicists Run Out of Greek Letters
“I don’t get all this fuss. I thought one of the Greek letters was already nu,” said one physics student.Photo by Julia Wong A recent announcement …
Local Dog Retrofitted to Learn New Trick
Excels at rolling over
If You Really Think About It, Life Is Just a Game as a Service
I remember when the first arcades opened. My brother would spend hours in them, coming home late at night on an empty stomach after turning his …
“House Hunters” Renewed
Houses go into hiding
Professor Shows Subway Surfers Gameplay Videos During Lecture
Professor Ious is now allowing students to use Subway Surfers Coins to buy power-ups on exams.Photo by Julia Wong During this year’s winter class registration, students …
LinkedIn Announces Short-Form Video Service
“It’s so easy to make short-form video content,” said Devontre Prenuer. “Personally, I squeeze it in between my 4:30 a.m. run and my 5 a.m. meditation.”Photo …
Climate Activist Throws Taco Bell Food Items at Sun God, Students Rejoice
“Scientists have said we’ll be on a time Crunchwrap even if we act now,” explained Daniel Gould.Photo by Amit Roth This past Friday at noon, on …
