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Cutting-Edge Computer Virus Sweeps Through Campus
“This would be a beautiful sight if my essay wasn’t on that computer,” one student commented.Photo By Maria Dhilla On Thursday afternoon, the cybersecurity office at …
Local Flint Shortage Sparks Absolutely Nothing
“I was having a real tough time figuring out what to do without any flint,” said Susan Graves, “and then it struck me.”Photo By Julia Wong …
Joe Rogan Defends Controversial Interview with the Devil
After hearing a comment from Satan, Joe Rogan said, “Hey Jamie, can you pull a clip up of that guy burning in Hell?”Photo by Julia Wong …
Student with 300 Tabs Open Wonders Why Computer Is Slow
“It’s a little stuffy in here,” Milieu noted. “Let me open up a new window.”Photo by Maria Dhilla Fourth-year Ava Milieu has recently faced intense public …
April Fool! This Student Has Been Trying to Nurse a Dead Plant Back to Life for the Past Three Months
“It’s just hibernating,” insisted Nohope.Photo by Sharon Roth On March 3, second-year student Theresa Nohope realized her aloe plant had been dead for the last three …
Crossword Answers (secret!!!)
Crossword Answers (secret!!!) Don’t tell a soul about these.
Student Creates Hobbit-Hole out of Dorm Room, Lists it on Airbnb
Mackenzie Richards, a third-year mechanical engineering major and business minor, has transformed her dorm room in Rita Atkinson Residences into a Lord of the Rings -inspired …
There’s No Ethical Consumption Under Capitalism vs. Hey, That’s My Lasagna!
Point: There’s No Ethical Consumption Under Capitalism I’m sorry Jon, but suggesting that the social grievances brought on by our capitalist-dominated society can be reformed through …
