Articles
Florida Crocodiles Sue Croc Brand Footwear Over Trademark Dispute
The court struggled to find jurors unbiased towards Crocs.Photo by Jack Yang After years of dispute, a group of Florida crocodiles is filing a discrimination lawsuit against …
Disneyland and UC System Compete for Highest Prices
UCSD and Disney are also currently engaged in a trademark dispute over the name “King Triton.”Photo by Sharon Roth With spring and summer break just around the …
Raccoon Themed “Pirates of the Caribbean” Ride Creates a Sinkhole in Sixth Parking Lot
UCSD officials apologized for disrupting “the foundation of trust” between students and faculty.Photo by Sharon Roth After a controversial decision by Chancellor Khosla to install a raccoon-themed …
Disneyland and UC System Compete for Highest Prices
UCSD and Disney are also currently engaged in a trademark dispute over the name “King Triton.”Photo by Sharon Roth With spring and summer break just around the …
Burger King Announces New Snakey Shakey to compete with McDonald’s Shamrock Shake
Burger King announced that every Kid’s Shake will come with a free rattle.Photo by Sharon Roth In a new step towards commercializing holidays across the calendar, Burger …
Valentine’s Day Goes Paperless to Appeal to “Those Whiny Kids”
Kids lauded the move as a “true act of love” toward the Earth.Photo by Silver Wallace In a bid to reconcile outdated courting practices, major Valentine’s card …
Local Man Can’t Understand Why He Can’t Bring up Gore at the Dinner Table
After performing his “sausage as noose” routine for the fourth night in a row, Jason Roth reportedly told his disapproving mother, “What do you mean mom? …
Child Politician Criticized for Inconsistency After Position on Favorite Color Changes
Wilson responded to critics: “What can I say? I don’t see color.”Photo by Jack Yang Five year-old politician Desmond Wilson recently stated that his favorite color is …
Scripps Institute of Oceanography Creates First Human-Whale Hybrid to Survive Rising Oceans
One spectator called the hybrid “impossible to escape, impossible to forget.”Photo by Jack Yang Dr. Margaret Lienen, Director of Scripps Institute of Oceanography (SIO), recently confirmed that …
Soldiers Enraged as Mouse and Keyboard are Disabled for Potential WWIII
Vargas complained that disabling mouse and keyboard would ruin his “epic 89% accuracy rate.”Photo by Jack Yang On Monday, January 13, US Secretary of Defense Mark Esper …
