Dan Kaliblotzky
Susan’s Foolproof Bagels
Gluten Tag! Welcome to the latest edition of Susan’s mostly-baking-but-really-just-a-venting-session Baking Blog where she tackles Bagels (and the encroachment of loneliness into her life)
Area Man to Resume In-Person Conversation Mid-June
After the party, Kalebloomsky said, “The dude I was talking to wouldn’t leaf me alone.”Photo by Sharon Roth It has been announced that COVID-19 restrictions on local …
Trader Joe’s Bag Begs for Recycling
Trader Joe’s Bag Begs for Recycling A paper bag recently used to carry one bottle of Chardonnay out of a Trader Joe’s is now resting under …
Gerrymander US Districts in Gerry Mandering’s Long, Oddly-Shaped, Suspiciously Specific Adventure!
Pack all the Democrats in your area into your living room for this grand old party game! Gerry is Texas’ second congressional district, but he’s the first anthropomorphic congressional district…
Hit The Forest Floor in Mating Dance Dance Revolution!
Photo by Sharon Roth Dance your tail feathers off in the newest game by the same amalgamous neon dancing slaves — who double as video game developers …
What is Professor Oak’s academic certification?
What is Professor Oak’s academic certification? Oak started his career as an undergraduate studying critical gender studies at the University of Kanto Celadon before flunking out …
Local Student Only Pays $1,400 of Tuition Because They “Paid the Rest of It in Earlier Quarters”
“I’m running a personal deficit,” Ramirez said. “The school is lucky they’re getting anything at all.”Photo by Jack Yang Local student Abby Ramirez recently exposed a loophole …
Ache of the Hummingbird Muffin
By Hummingbird M. UffinPastry-Adjacent Food Item Everyone asks how the food is, but nobody asks HOW the food is. I have endured true struggle in this …
Gamestop Offers $5 Trade-in Deal for GME Shares
Gamestop Offers $5 Trade-in Deal for GME Shares Video game retailer GameStop has unveiled a new trade-in service in response to the attention they’ve received from …
Local Phantom Kicked Out of Opera for Ineffective Mask
Local Phantom Kicked Out of Opera for Ineffective Mask A regular guest of the Paris Opera House known as “The Phantom of the Opera” was recently …
