Volume 30
Humans Declared Critically Endangered by ‘Guy Who Can’t Get Laid’
An intern for the Environmental Protection Agency recently declared humans an endangered species on the agency’s X account. The post was quickly retracted by the intern’s …
UCSD Introduces Productivity Pods to Help Students Study
“These are apparently a part of the new study a-pod program,” said Stanly Wrighter.Photo by Erica Rosslee In preparation for the upcoming final exams, UC San …
Rats Unionize
UC San Diego’s rodent population has recently received recognition as an organized union by campus administration. The Lab Rats’ 12-month campaign has garnered them protections against …
LaCroix Announces New Boxing Day Hotdog Eating Competition
“The hotdog buns taste so much better now,” said Jack Peanut. “It makes me want to LaCry.”Photo by Julia Wong I n the company’s latest advertising …
Dining Hall Workers Can’t Serve for Shit vs. We Serve Cunt
POINT: Dining Hall Workers Can’t Serve for Shit Is it so bad to want for more in life? Is it such a sin to want the …
Every Time a College is Opened, a Provost Gains its Wings
With the opening of Eighth College this year and the anticipated opening of more in the near future, upwards mobility in the provost job market is …
University Claims ‘The Creature Isn’t Our Problem’
“I spoke to The Creature and I thought he was a really nice guy,” said one UCSD administrator.Photo by Julia Wong Last Monday, UC San Diego …
Cat Takes Shelter Inside Fridge
It’s an Ice Stray
Happy 40th Birthday to the Stuart Art Collection! vs What Even Are All These Weird Pieces of Art?
POINT: Happy 40th Birthday to the Stuart Art Collection! Have you ever been on an amble through campus when you have stumbled upon a curious, nay, …
