March 13, 2024 Straight from the ass's mouth. Volume XXX Issue V

Written by: The MQ

December 6, 2023

  1. Never turn 18
  2. Just close the window
  3. Tell them your mom said no
  4. Smoke so much pot that you’re legally a hippie
  5. Keep asking when you get to meet General Motors
  6. Threaten the recruiter with Peepaw’s fortune
  7. Wear full camouflage so they can’t see you
  8. Fail the FitnessGram PACER Test
  9. Be a fortunate son
  10. Get bone spurs
The MQ

The premier satire magazine at UC San Diego.

Last modified: December 5, 2023

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