Volume 28 Issue 2
Girls With Crystals to Reignite the Salem Witch Trials
“Tarot cards? This is a taro latte,” said one of the “witches.”Photo by Sharon Roth Self-proclaimed “witches” are over fire after burning crosses, voodoo dolls, and other …
Price Center’s TapEx Is Tired of Being Confused for Tampax –– Considers Rename
Price Center’s TapEx Is Tired of Being Confused for Tampax –– Considers Rename Tapioca Express, the only boba shop on campus for decades, has recently mostly …
UCSD Students Become One with Racoons During Dining Hall Crisis
“This tastes like trash,” said Vingh. “Thank you,” said the raccoon.Photo by Maria Dhilla This year, understaffed dining halls have struggled to provide service to a record …
UCSD Announces “Bold, Firm” Plan to Decarbonize “by the Time the Earth is Swallowed by the Sun”
“Green energy? Sorry, I don’t see color,” claimed Khosla.Photo by Sharon Roth Following years of pressure by campus climate activists, UCSD admin declared their intention to “fully …
Disney Announces New LGBT Show, No Queer Characters Planned
One disgruntled viewer complained, “The Bible says Adam and Eve, not Mickey and Donald.”Photo by Yuri Bukhradze In the latest announcement of upcoming Disney+ content, the …
All Dining Dollars Converted to Triton Cash: Students Feast in Laundry Rooms
“At least I know my food is clean,” said Lyall.Photo by Jack Yang With understaffing and poor working conditions causing eon-long wait times at dining halls, UCSD …
What College Are You In? vs. Who Cares?
Point: You’ll Never Get Ahold of Me Lucky Charms! By Anna Ying First-Year Hi! What college are you in? I’m in Seventh. What’s your major? I’m …
UCSD Wins Rights to Build Ninth College Atop Gliderport Parking
“I’d be angry with what’s happening right now,” said Byrd, “but the view is so breathtaking I keep on forgetting.”Photo by Sharon Roth In a landmark case …
Anti-defamation League Champions New Era of Kindness
Anti-defamation League Champions New Era of Kindness On October 21st, President Biden unknowingly flashed a white supremacist hand symbol while he was at a Town Hall …
Researchers Prove Center Hall Chairs Combat Student Sleeping Epidemic
“We will not stand for this,” said one member of Tritons Against Torture. “We’re going to host a sit-in.”Photo by Maria Dhilla After months of tedious research, …
