Campus
Survey Finds Majority of College Students “Gastronomically Unprepared” for COVID-19
As an increasing number of students are forced to stay home, experts are reportedly concerned about an imminent spike in home fires.Photo by Sharon Roth With no …
Student Activists Demand COLA, UC Replies, “Is PEPSI Okay?”
Pepsi Co reportedly plans to feature the protest in a new commercial.Photo by Jack Yang The University of California school system has issued an official response to …
Local Leprechauns Threatened by Climate Change: “Too Much Sun, Not Enough Rainbows”
When questioned by reporters, one leprechaun said, “It’s not easy being green, but it’s not over until it’s clover!”Photo by Jack Yang As winter draws to a …
Local Student Prophesizes “Total Apocalypse” if Regents Switch to Semester System
Kovalenko reportedly has lost “ample amounts of money” because he insists on paying cash but refuses to accept change.Photo by Sharon Roth In a public statement, …
Animal Crossing: New Horizons to Include Gentrification
Isabelle also offers the option of forcing villagers to stop speaking their dialect of Animalese if the player deems it “unprofessional.”Photo by Dan Kaliblotzky Nintendo has …
Freshman Fails in Search for Crush’s Mysterious Boyfriend Who ‘Doesn’t go here’
Jacobs said, “If she has a boyfriend, then why does she keep popping up on my roommate’s Tinder?”Photo by Sharon Roth Joel Jacobs, a first year in …
Disneyland and UC System Compete for Highest Prices
UCSD and Disney are also currently engaged in a trademark dispute over the name “King Triton.”Photo by Sharon Roth With spring and summer break just around the …
Disneyland and UC System Compete for Highest Prices
UCSD and Disney are also currently engaged in a trademark dispute over the name “King Triton.”Photo by Sharon Roth With spring and summer break just around the …
Elon Musk Deemed “Not Morally Ambiguous Enough” to Qualify as Name for Sixth College
Musk later tweeted: “Once I get to Mars, I’ll show them.”Photo by Jay Noonan Last week, UCSD’s college naming committee released their bi-weekly transparency report detailing polling …
We Don’t Need Seven More Colleges vs. But If We Have 13, Sun God Can Finally Ascend to His True Form
Point: We Don’t Need Seven More Colleges UCSD is a big school. Plopped on the cliffs of La Jolla, the top research university has an undergraduate …
