Gage Tanzman
UCSD Professor Holds Office Hours Days After Exam, Considered for Position in CAPS
In the syllabus, Professor Weyting stated: “If these office hours don’t work for you, let’s meet never.”Photo by Jack Yang UCSD Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) has …
Local Scrabble Champion Outraged: “If Marijuana is Legal, Proper Nouns Should Be Too”
Moms have been concerned that this scrabble will lead kids to dabble in more complex word games.Photo by Maria Dhilla The legalization of marijuana has been making …
Ask Emily Queue
Emily Queue here answering your questions like: Can I still eat at Chick-fil-A? At what point is it cannibalism? Am I a fraud?
Pepsi Releases New European Line: Pepoui
Pepsi Releases New European Line: Pepoui European citizens and Pepsi enthusiasts alike are rejoicing at the new release of a French-themed take on the American soft …
Local Pre-Law Student Mourned by All
Local Pre-Law Student Mourned by All The entire UCSD community is in mourning following the loss of local pre-law student, Shmexter Shmamilton. Known by his peers …
The Weeknd Delivers an Astonishing Allegory of Society via Super Bowl Halftime Show
A particularly philosophical commenter said, “One must imagine the Weeknd happy.”Photo by Jack Yang Grammy award-winning Canadian singer The Weeknd has been praised recently for his thought-provoking …
Florida Governor Passes “Frenchifying” Mandate to Boost European Tourism
The water skier was reportedly heard saying, “Ouiiiii!”Photo by Sharon Roth Many Florida residents are outraged by a new mandate passed by Governor Jean-Claude Bernard requiring all …
I Joined Four Different D&D Campaigns to Avoid My Own Trauma
(Art by Marcela Longhini) By Jaquelline Dalavash Avid D&D Campaigner Dungeons and Dragons has a reputation for being a nerdy game of dice, hexagons, and plastic …
Area Woman Living Alone With Three Cats Insists: “I’m Fine!”
“Do we live just to die?” asked Monroe. “Meow,” said her cat.Photo by Sharon Roth The quarantining caused by the COVID-19 pandemic has stretched on for over …
Man From Bay Area Has Inexplicable Southern Accent; Experts Perplexed
Man From Bay Area Has Inexplicable Southern Accent; Experts Perplexed A man from the Bay Area has caused mass confusion due to his inexplicable Southern accent. …
