Campus
UCSD Invests in Alarm Clock System Disguised as Construction
“Ever since this construction, I’ve been having really vivid dreams of two Transformers going at it,” said Hertz.Photo by Julia Wong Throughout campus, students at UCSD …
Fighter Jet Flyovers of Campus to Increase
A random onlooker cried out: “It’s a bird, it’s a plane, oh fuck, it is a plane!”Photo by Yuri Bukhradze UCSD students have long dealt with …
RA Expecting to Bust a Party Accidentally Busts a Lecture
“I knew they were having a party,” insisted Letale. “Why else would they have their hands up?”Photo by Jack Yang Resident Advisor Tad Letale recounted his most …
Defaced Lecture Hall Causes Quantum Controversy
“I’m so confused, I thought hall was spelled with one ‘L,’” asked Macalou.Photo By Julia Wong The UCSD community was met with shock last Wednesday after …
La Jolla Family Rents Out Doghouse to UCSD Student Amidst Housing Crisis
“I like having the extra money,” said Mrs. MacInson. “But I no longer have a place to send my husband to when he messes around with …
UC Regents Evacuates UCSD, Raccoon Insurgency Rises to Power
“One man’s trash is another man’s missile defense system,” said Drake.Photo by Sharon Roth Uncertainty and fear struck the hearts of the UCSD community as UC Regents …
Raccoon Cult Offers UCSD Students Secure Housing
Some students claim to have witnessed a demonic possession, but it was just a case of rabies.Photo by Maria Dhilla With over 50,000 admitted students and a …
UCSD to Give Out Commemorative Tents to Students as a Solution for the Housing Crisis
“As a Muir student, I’m really digging the return to nature. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss running water,” admitted Bartlett.Photo by …
Local Crypto-Entomologist Finds a Bug in His Code
“Cockroach, null pointer, stick bug, ladybug, stack overflow, rhinoceros beetle, moth, caterpillar, infinite recursion, worm, centipede, millipede. These are my favorite bugs, in order,” said Turing.Photo …
UCSD Spam Quarantine Email Name to be Changed “Out of Respect” for Past Events
“Any student who mentions the email will be put in isolation for 40 days,” threatened Khosla.Photo by Robin Brewin This past Saturday, a private meeting to …
