Volume 29 Issue 3

ArticlesCampusNews

Professor Shows Subway Surfers Gameplay Videos During Lecture

Written by: Maddie Samaniego

Professor Ious is now allowing students to use Subway Surfers Coins to buy power-ups on exams.Photo by Julia Wong During this year’s winter class registration, students …

ArticlesNewsTech

LinkedIn Announces Short-Form Video Service

Written by: Connor Betterly

“It’s so easy to make short-form video content,” said Devontre Prenuer. “Personally, I squeeze it in between my 4:30 a.m. run and my 5 a.m. meditation.”Photo …

ArticlesCampusNews

Climate Activist Throws Taco Bell Food Items at Sun God, Students Rejoice

Written by: Matthew Ware

“Scientists have said we’ll be on a time Crunchwrap even if we act now,” explained Daniel Gould.Photo by Amit Roth This past Friday at noon, on …

ArticlesNewsTech

Butter Flavored Vape Creates New Disease, Movie Popcorn Lung

Written by: Elizabeth Overton

“Is it salted or unsalted butter?” asked Monica Clouds. “I’m trying to watch my blood pressure.”Photo by Connor Betterly Last month, the popular e-cigarette and vape …

ArticlesNewsTech

Leaked Internal Twitter Memo States that Elon Musk “Has No Idea What He’s Doing”

Written by: Jacob King and Everett Ririe

Reports of events at Twitter headquarters were not officially confirmed, but were verified by an anonymous Twitter employee.Photo by Julia Wong Recently, Elon Musk finalized his …

ArticlesCampusNews

HDH Recruits Gordon Ramsay to Fix Their “Kitchen Nightmares”

Written by: Connor Betterly

“This chicken is so undercooked, it’s still crossing the road!” cried Ramsay.Photo by Julia Wong For years, students have rated their experience at the campus’ dining …

ArticlesHolidaysNews

Scientists Discover Long-Lost Thanksgiving Music

Written by: Farhad Taraporevala

“I’m so glad I have something to play loudly during dinner so I don’t have to talk to my family,” said Thanksgiving music enthusiast Davide Strallman.Photo …

ArticlesCampusNews

Professor Branches Out to Streaming Professionally After Lecture Recordings Succeed

Written by: Olivia Scarborough

“I got banned from Twitch chat,” alleged one student. “Can I still pass the class?”Photo by Amit Roth The COVID-19 pandemic forced many aspects of modern …

ArticlesOpinionPoint - Counter Point

Sleep Tight, Don’t Let the Bed Bugs Bite! vs. All Families Deserve to Be Fed

Written by: Millie You

POINT: Sleep Tight, Don’t Let the Bed Bugs Bite! Within a week of moving into my new home, it was evident to me that I had …

ArticlesOpinionPoint - Counter Point

Throwing Food on Paintings Is an Ineffectual Protest vs. It Makes the Paintings Taste Better

Written by: Pranav Reddy

POINT: Throwing Food on Paintings Is an Ineffectual Protest I can’t believe people do this. This publicity stunt does nothing to talk about climate change. You …