Volume 28 Issue 3
I Got Salmonella From UCSD Dining Halls vs. We Don’t Even Serve Salmon!
Point: I Got Salmonella From UCSD Dining Halls By Sam O. Nella Hungry Student This is ridiculous. I pay God knows how much for housing (which …
Nasa Launches Cat-based Lunar Module
Always lands on its feet
Developer Builds Houses That Come Pre-Haunted
“The previous tenants loved this house to death,” said Pierce.Photo by Maria Dhilla With current housing market trends causing strife for prospective home-owners and forcing poor, desperate …
1,000 Dead in the War on Christmas
By Xander Goldman Proud American It’s no secret that life is getting tougher for conservative, Christian, patriotic Americans like me. Still, it’s a tough pill to …
Nasa Launches Cat-based Lunar Module
Always lands on its feet
New Study Reveals Why All the YouTubers You Liked as a Kid Are Now Anti-Vaxxers
“I don’t need a vaccine to protect me; I have diamond armor,” wrote @fathogjones on Twitter.Photo by Connor Betterly As the number of vaccine mandates grows …
Sun God Weeps During Finals Week
Sun God Weeps During Finals Week Early this morning, second- year Jeremy Beremy was walking to an 8 a.m. class and reported seeing a trickle of …
Susan Bagel: Gingerbread
A ruminating Bagel, perched atop her suburban fortress, awaiting a man more substantial than the one in her hands. It’s winter, and I wake up cold. …
Wastewater Detection Systems Find Baby in Sewers After 2018 Masturbation-in-Shower Epidemic
“You think I’m gonna support these children?” asked Khosla, “I don’t even support these students.”Photo by Jack Yang On November 17th at 5:36 p.m., UCSD Wastewater Detection’s …
Local Queer Couple Speedrun Marriage Any Percent
Local Queer Couple Speedrun Marriage Any Percent Nonbinary lesbian couple Anne B. Goye and Robynn Drew have set a new record for modern queer marriages, managing …
