Volume 28 Issue 3
President Xi Jinping’s Family-Friendly, Close-Up Magic TikTok Series Goes Viral
After the new plan was enacted on the platform, tensions have reportedly risen between the BTS Army and the People’s Liberation Army.Photo by Sharon Roth Since the …
Statisticians Create New Phe-Nominal Scale for Extra Special Data Points
“Noferror’s rebuttal of my use of medians was valid, but some of the comments made by other statisticians were just plain mean,” said Stribution.Photo by Maria Dhilla …
Santa Claus Teams With Jeff Bezos, Can Finally “Watch Who’s Naughty and Who’s Nice”
Due to a global resource shortage, Santa and Bezos are considering employing naughty kids in coal mines.Photo by Maria Dhilla This holiday season, former Amazon CEO Jeff …
UCSD Gets Railed by Blue Line Extension
Khosla announced the opening of the trolley by reading out of Dr Seuss’ One Line, Two Line, Red Line, Blue Line.Photo by Sharon Roth Over the course …
Top 10 Suspects Who Ran Grandma Over
Top 10 Suspects Who Ran Grandma Over Antifa Hypothermia Mariah Carey on a Zamboni Our stepdad Scott on ketamine A moose with no prior criminal record …
UCSD Implements Inclusivity “Mxndate”, Enforces Binary “Mxntality”
Photo by Sharon Roth After months of anticipation and several strongly worded email from campus TERFs, UCSD is finally rolling out their “Inclusivity Mxndate.” Chancellor Khosla …
