Articles
Man Gets What He Wants by Wishing upon a Star
“I tried to wish on the star too,” said Richard #29, “but nothing happened.”Photo by Dylan Schmidt In a series of events reported as “rare” by …
Disney Copyrights ‘Everything’
“I think these copyright laws are really Goofy… I mean silly!” said Benson Honeydid.Photo by Julia Wong Following the recent introduction of the classic Disney short …
Tesla Is the Future of Accessibility vs. How Do I Open These Fucking Doors
POINT: Tesla Is the Future of Accessibility The worst thing to happen to anybody just happened to me. I’m temporarily disabled because of a tragic bus …
UCSD Transportation Services Debuts Airline
“What’s the deal with HDH airline food?” asked one student.Photo by Connor Betterly This weekend, Chancellor Pradeep Khosla announced that, in an effort to ease students’ …
UCSD Announces Plan to Become Carbon Neutral
“The warmth of Chancellor Khosla’s new car is enough for all of Sixth College,” said one student.Photo by Julia Wong In order to become carbon neutral, …
Goodnight Moon Challenged in Schools After Debate Regarding Moon’s Existence
“It’s time for us to say goodnight to the nefarious influence of this book,” said one parent.Photo by Millie You The string of conservative-led book bans …
UCSD Introduces Productivity Pods to Help Students Study
“These are apparently a part of the new study a-pod program,” said Stanly Wrighter.Photo by Erica Rosslee In preparation for the upcoming final exams, UC San …
LaCroix Announces New Boxing Day Hotdog Eating Competition
“The hotdog buns taste so much better now,” said Jack Peanut. “It makes me want to LaCry.”Photo by Julia Wong I n the company’s latest advertising …
Dining Hall Workers Can’t Serve for Shit vs. We Serve Cunt
POINT: Dining Hall Workers Can’t Serve for Shit Is it so bad to want for more in life? Is it such a sin to want the …
Eucalyptus Grove Marches on Geiselgard
“To all the students who think they can support the Ent uprising, I have one thing to say to you,” said Chancellor Pradeep Khosla. “You shall …
