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Area Man Shoots Down Drone, Declares Himself King of the Skies, Ruler of the Four Winds

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After shooting down a neighbor’s drone hovering 25 feet above the ground in his front yard, local electrician and recreational firearm enthusiast Boris Knotwood leveraged his …

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Area Mad Scientist Crowdfunds Affront to God

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Area Mad Scientist Hugo Mounster began using crowdfunding platform GoFundMe to raise money to create life that is “an affront to all the gods of man.” …

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Local Instagram Users Capture Never-Before-Seen Sunset

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A group of Instagrammers managed to photograph what they described as “a sunset like no one had ever seen in the transition between WebMD’s list of …

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La Jolla Hammerhead Admits Dissatisfaction with Local Real Estate, Heads Back to Mexico

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La Jolla Shores Beach was emptied last week in response to a hammerhead shark sighting. Contrary to popular belief and hearsay, the shark had not arrived …

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Area Cat First Ever to Catch the Red Dot

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Guthrie Jagermanjensen, a seven-year-old British shorthair from Claremont Mesa accomplished the “glorious feat” of catching the red dot that has eluded cats around the world for …