Volume 29
Top Ten Uses for Your $200 Textbook
A tofu press A welcome mat A sleep aid (blunt force trauma) To recite from memory at an open mic night To cover up the comic …
Boris Johnson Reelected as U.K.’s Next Prime Minister, Resigns
Former Prime Minister Liz Truss recently resigned after causing the current economic crises facing the U.K. and prompting the value of the pound to plummet. In …
The Padres Blow It Again
Since the Chargers “abandoned” San Diego in 2017, the Padres are the only remaining major sports team in San Diego. The Padres did better than many …
UC Regents To Begin Recycling Students
In an effort to be more sustainable, the UC Regents have decided to start recycling students. “It’s really a no-brainer,” said UC President Michael Drake. “We’ve …
Timothée Chalamet Goes Outside, Buys Milk
“I can’t believe he bought cow’s milk,” declared Lamborda. “I’m still a fan, but just a little bit less.”Photo by Julia Wong This morning, Timothée Chalamet …
Mobile Stationery Causes Confusion
Panic seized the student body last Monday, following an apparent violation of the laws of reality: the arrival of “Ms. Pell’s Mobile Stationery Store On Wheels” …
UCSD to Repaint Geisel Lobby After Redesign Blinds Students
“We want students to be drawn to the library like moths to a flame,” said Gibbons.Photo by Julia Wong Upon the recent unveiling of the new …
