Volume 26 Issue 2

ArticlesLocalNews

Man Only Wears Designer “Supreme” Streetwear After Near-God Experience

Written by: Mariah Barrios

In response to Lee’s new perspective on life, God said, “Let your wallet be light.”Photo by Sharon Roth Second-year UCSD student Joseph Lee has gained notoriety …

ArticlesCampusNews

UCSD and MTS to Introduce A, B, S, & D Transit Passes

Written by: Issac Canada

“I thought San Diego had a really good public transit system, but they really just threw us under the bus,” shared a student.Photo by Jay Noonan …

ArticlesCampusNews

UCSD Student in DEI Lecture Looks Forward to Making Casually Racist Comment

Written by: Sage Cristal

Magdalin “immediately regretted” making attendance mandatory.Photo by Jack Yang Early this morning a group of UCSD students contacted university officials with concerns that a fellow classmate …

ArticlesCampusNews

Increase of Missing Hydro Flasks as “WSCO” Cult Expands

Written by: Shantelle Brooks

The pictured thief reportedly got away from the scene by disappearing into a huge cloud of paper straws.Photo by Jack Yang Amber Alerts across the UCSD campus …

ArticlesNewsPolitics

White House Hires Plumber to Fix Leaks

Written by: Quoc Tran

“No offense to my boss, but duct tape can’t really fix these leaks,” said Secretary Stewart. Photo by Jade Coniglio White House Chief of Staff Mick …

ArticlesCampusLocalNews

Sorority Girls Experience Near Death on Local Torrey Pines Hike

Written by: Hanaa Moosavi

“If we get out of here alive, I swear we’re gonna take that trip to Spain,” Fillis said to Stutten.Photo by Jay Noonan Sorority sisters Jessica …

ArticlesCampusNews

UCSD Claims $20,000 Tuition Hike a “Spooky-Season Prank”

Written by: Adian Valdez

Despite publishing the tuition hike as a prank video, Khosla did not go viral, nor increase his subscriber count.Photo by Jack Yang UCSD has recently backtracked …

ArticlesCampusNewsUncategorized

Lab Students Upset That Wearing Lab Coats Does Not Improve Midterm Scores

Written by: Pilan Scruggs

“But they emphasized PPE so much during lecture!” said Kartashev.Photo by Jack Yang This past Monday UCSD was “filled with shouts of incredulity and misery” as …

ArticlesCampusNews

UCSD Ranked #1 University by “Getting Hit by a Bike” Magazine

Written by: Robert Renfro

Reporters state that as soon as the interview was finished, another bike crash occurred outside the studio.Photo by Jack Yang UC San Diego has been honored with …

ArticlesCampusNews

Out-of-State Freshman Won’t Shut Up About How She’s a ‘Cali Girl’ Now

Written by: Megan Cox

“If Elaine says ‘hella’ one more time, I’m gonna split her surfboard in half,” lamented her roommate.Photo by Jack Yang UCSD Freshman Elaine Eaken’s roommates have …