Top Ten Ways You’re Celebrating Your One Year Anniversary of Quarantining With alcohol Re-dyeing your hair Going on another walk Burning all your masks symbolically and …

Local Lawyer Disbarred after “Excessive Use” of Taylor Swift Quotes The American Bar Association recently disbarred a criminal defense attorney for unprecedented behavior. Despite repeated requests …

McQueen Tells All Kachow! I’ve been turned into a cow. Hey guys, it’s me, Lightning McQueen. I bet you wanna’ know how I got here. Well, …

Governor Newsom Ends “Bummer” Stay-at-home Order The Governor of California, Gavin Newsom, has recently ended the stay-at-home order afflicting the entirety of California. In a shocking, …

Gamestop Offers $5 Trade-in Deal for GME Shares Video game retailer GameStop has unveiled a new trade-in service in response to the attention they’ve received from …

Student Comes Out as Non-binary, Assaulted with Kindness Local student, Bandrew Bitko, has recently reported an “assault of kindness” after they came out as non-binary. Bitko …

Warner Brothers Announces Barney the Dinosaur Kaiju Film Ahead of the release of “Godzilla vs. Kong,” Warner Brothers announced that beloved character Barney the Dinosaur would …

Student Copes with Loneliness Through Horrible Film Binge The pain of a recent breakup coupled with the stress of remote learning have brought local student Melanie …

Spotify Wrapped Now Includes Theft of Wages Stat In a new twist to the annual Spotify Wrapped statistics given to listeners on the platform, Spotify has …

Mcdonald’s to Serve Carbonated Eggnog In an unexpected move that both horrified and confused consumers nationwide, McDonald’s has announced that they will be serving carbonated eggnog …