Matthew Miltimore
Flattened in a distro cart accident, the MQ replaced his bones with leftover printer ink. With his increased lank, Matt has become a pivotal writer for the MQ through his fluidity. Whether demonstrated through his mastery of satire or being used as a keycard when we lock ourselves out of the office, Matt is a key asset to the writing team.
Sigma Chi Throws Party on Sinking Ship
Sigma Chi Throws Party on Sinking Ship Despite an inspection that revealed that the hull is rapidly filling with water, the Iota Chi chapter of Sigma …
a year of comebacks: first the jonas brothers, then hannah montana, next polio
2019 has seen both a reunion of The Jonas Brothers, with the release of their singles “Sucker” and “Cool,” and a tease regarding a potential reboot …
Eight Knives Found in Caesar Salad
The latest in a string of lettuce-related crimes occurred this Saturday in UCSD’s Goody’s Market when a local student found eight pieces of sharp cutlery in …
LaCroix CEO Decides to Add Actual Flavor to Product
National Beverage Corporation, producer of “vaguely fruit-flavored” LaCroix seltzer water, faces new challenges following the release of a report last Thursday revealing a 39 percent drop …
