Volume 31
NFL Declares Hundred-Year Study on Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy
“My head hurts,” said one player.Photo by Amit Roth Last week, National Football League Commissioner Roger Goodell announced a new initiative aimed at understanding the long-term …
Geekvape Launches Pacifiers
“I am ripping phat cloudz off this cart. JUULius Caesar is almost empty,” said preschooler Little Jimmy.Photo by Dylan Schmidt Geekvape, a leading manufacturer of electronic …
UCSD Acquires Trolley for Student Housing
“Next station: Blue Line Hall,” stated the trolley intercom. “La siguiente estación: Blue Line Hall. Blue Line Hall is next.”Photo by Amit Roth A recently declassified …
I’ll Never Find Love and Neither Will You vs. I’ve Already Found Love but You Just Can’t Meet Her Cuz She Lives in Canada
POINT: I’ll Never Find Love and Neither Will You At the ripe old age of 20, I’ve lived, I’ve laughed… so when will I find love?! …
Gen Z Trends Towards Puritanism
A recent poll conducted on Gen Z revealed that Puritanism is once again “in” and “hip with the kids.” Analysts report that an unprecedented 70% of …
