Top Ten

Top Ten

Top Ten Ways You Know You Peaked in High School

Written by: The MQ

You’re still wearing your letterman jacket four years later Most of your conversations with friends begin with, “Hey, remember that time in precalc…” You occasionally email …

Top Ten

Top Ten Similarities Between Your Midterm and Your Estranged Father

Written by: The MQ

They both failed you Sprung up on you in the middle of your biology class Still surprisingly good at making you feel insecure You have a …

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Top Ten Similarities between UCSD on Move-Out Day and the San Diego Zoo

Written by: The MQ

You spent a majority of the time being hopelessly lost Someone keeps playing “Who Let the Dogs Out?” and it stopped being funny hours ago Parking …

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Top Fifteen Hobbies Too Extreme for Your Mom to Know About

Written by: The MQ

Driving five over the speed limit Purposefully stepping on cracks Avoiding having to call your grandparents Competitive sleeping Going outside with wet hair Embezzlement Tightrope walking …

Top Ten

Top Ten Reasons to Go Nocturnal This Summer

Written by: The MQ

Dim lighting will hide all of your flaws Your cat won’t have any excuse to ignore you Everyone knows that night school is night cool You …

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Top Ten Reasons to Start Smoking

Written by: The MQ

To prove anti-smoking advertising doesn’t work on you Injecting is getting old To get that raspy and gravelly singing voice you need in the country music …

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Top Fifteen Ways That Cavemen Were Better than Us

Written by: The MQ

Tinder was important for a different reason They could afford a cave They didn’t use “Neanderthal” as an insult They got to watch “The Flintstones” live …

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Top Ten: Ways to Tell If Your Roommate Is in the Mafia

Written by: The MQ

Your room is filled with decapitated horse bodies Their solution to most problems is “I know a guy” Their pasta comes out perfect every time They …

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Top Fifteen Similarities Between an Art Gallery and a Truck Stop Glory Hole

Written by: The MQ

“Anybody could do that” People pay $9.99 a month to look at shit You’ve always dreamed of getting jerked off by a stranger there The really …

Top Ten

Top Ten Ways to Make This Unpaid Internship Worthwhile

Written by: The MQ

Finally earn that second accented “e” in resume Learn how to stalk people on LinkedIn Steal Post-It notes and paper clips and fashion them into a …