Articles
College Student Swears By “The Graduate” Method; Friends Call It “Mommy Issues”
Zagard described the moves of his latest date to be “just like Mom used to make.”Photo by Jack Yang After major backlash from community members, the US …
Spectrum Redefines Limits of Acceptable Service
“I’d send a strongly worded email,” said Ngo, “but my router won’t stop catching on fire.”Photo by Maria Dhilla The ongoing COVID-19 pandemic has dealt harsh blows …
Local Teen Girl Justifies New Years Party
In response to one party-goer claiming that their cocaine was “95 percent pure,” another partygoer held up hand sanitizer, saying, “This is 99.9 percent pure.”Photo by Maria …
I Was the Lone AXE Body Spray Left Behind: This is My Story
After the aftermath of the insurrection on Capitol Hill, reporters searched furiously for the best photograph to encapsulate the experience of what many are calling “the …
I’m Haunted by Successful People Sharing My Name
My name is Mary Smith. Yes, that Mary Smith. I come from a long line of Mary Smiths, as I was named after my grandma, great-grandma, …
I’m Batman
We live in unprecedented times where world-altering challenges such as climate change, racial injustice, and, of course, the pandemic face us at every corner. For the …
Reagan can Trickle Down on MY Economy
By By Richard Montegomery III Future Millionaire Sometimes it’s hard to be living in America, especially right now because of the whole pandemic thing going on, …
Alexa? Teach me how to capture a woman’s heart. vs. Okay, here’s an article I found on “How to Capture a Woman, Murder her, and Sell Her Organs on the Black Market.”
Point: Alexa? Teach me how to capture a woman’s heart. Alexa? Teach me how to capture a woman’s heart. I mean really steal her heart in …
Discord Mods Confused About New Kitten Adoption Agency
“I hate that I actually know what a catgirl is now,” remarked Ahmed.Photo by Sharon Roth The local humane society has just opened up a newly added …
“Dead Man’s Party” Re-Enters US Billboard’s Hot 100s as Biden Presidency Begins
Who could ask for more? Many people did, but this is what we got.Photo by Jack Yang As President Joe Biden, noted as “still alive” by many …
