Volume 27
It’s Not Delivery
It’s an abomination
Bees Under Investigation for Illegal Activity
The Hive Guys burger chain was discovered to be a front for honey laundering.Photo by Jack Yang A recent FBI leak created quite a buzz when it …
Top Ten Names That Should be Used Instead of Egg Nog
Top Ten Names That Should be Used Instead of Egg Nog Nothing, we shouldn’t even drink it Eggspresso Yoeulk Cockadoodle brew Eggnipotent nog Unidentified white liquid …
US Debt Mysteriously Discovered Again After Disappearing for 4 Years
“To make money, one must spend money,” Trump claimed, as he raised the US debt seven trillion dollars.Photo by Jack Yang Soon after the recognition of Joe …
Top Ten Ways the Elf on the Shelf Has Ruined Your Life
Top Ten Ways the Elf on the Shelf Has Ruined Your Life Got your son used to a surveillance state Took the Christ out of Christmas …
The MQ’s Guide to HallMarQ Movies
The MQ’s Guide to HallMarQ Movies
We trained an AI on 1,000 hours of YouTube cooking videos and it turned into a YouTuber
Well, we done messed this
one up. Our bad. The interns
we stole from reputable
engineering companies were
SUPPOSED to create an AI,
force it to watch 1,000 hours
of cooking videos on YouTube,
and then have it make us tasty
treats in eternal servitude…
Moviegoers Petition to Implement New “PP” Rating for Pre-Pandemic Films, Citing Dangerous Behavior
Theaters have increased the number of showing times for Jim Carrey’s “The Mask.”Photo by Stephen Lightfoot A new viral campaign, called the PG-PP Movement, has emerged …
Academic Integrity Office Overwhelmed by Instances of Students “Venting” During Exam
A hard limit was placed on emergency meetings called during quizzes.Photo by Sharon Roth The Academic Integrity Office has reported 425 new cases of students being …
Politics Aren’t That Important vs. Yes, So You Shouldn’t Vote
Point: Politics Aren’t That Important By Benny Rourke Ambivalent Democrat/Moderate If you don’t want to vote, honestly it won’t bug me that much. I, for one, …
