27.4

Briefs

Student Copes with Loneliness Through Horrible Film Binge

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

Student Copes with Loneliness Through Horrible Film Binge The pain of a recent breakup coupled with the stress of remote learning have brought local student Melanie …

Features

ArticlesNewsPolitics

Brave Viking Clan Invades US Capitol to Fight for Traditional Roots in Fascism and Control

Written by: Andrew Sitko

“I have my rights,” said one rioter, “and it’s my job to make sure that other people don’t.”Photo by Jack Yang On January 6, a group of …

EditorialOpinion

I Was the Lone AXE Body Spray Left Behind: This is My Story

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

After the aftermath of the insurrection on Capitol Hill, reporters searched furiously for the best photograph to encapsulate the experience of what many are calling “the …

Sunday Comics

Yes

Written by: Andrew Sitko

White Guy with thick neck vs. Bandrew Bitko

ArticlesCampusNews

College Student Swears By “The Graduate” Method; Friends Call It “Mommy Issues”

Written by: Hanaa Moosavi

Zagard described the moves of his latest date to be “just like Mom used to make.”Photo by Jack Yang After major backlash from community members, the US …

ArticlesEditorialOpinion

I’m Haunted by Successful People Sharing My Name

Written by: Maria Dhilla

My name is Mary Smith. Yes, that Mary Smith. I come from a long line of Mary Smiths, as I was named after my grandma, great-grandma, …

ArticlesCampusLocalNews

Spectrum Redefines Limits of Acceptable Service

Written by: Pilan Scruggs

“I’d send a strongly worded email,” said Ngo, “but my router won’t stop catching on fire.”Photo by Maria Dhilla The ongoing COVID-19 pandemic has dealt harsh blows …

ArticlesEditorialOpinion

I’m Batman

Written by: Jacob King

We live in unprecedented times where world-altering challenges such as climate change, racial injustice, and, of course, the pandemic face us at every corner. For the …

Features

The MQ Writes The Next Great American Novel (Better Versions of The Great Gatsby)

Written by: The MQ

So we were sitting in front of an empty computer screen, getting ready to write the next great American novel, when we
found out that F. Scott Fitzgerald’s “The Great Gatsby” entered public domain. Might as well give that our best shot,
right? Why create new media, when we can ride on the coattails of media we know people will like? Everything’s a sequel
or reboot nowadays, anyway. 21st Century Fox, return our calls? Please.