Articles
I Killed Journalism
I killed it. Yup… it was me. Every time I clicked on a Washington Post article and I was refused entry, I slowly held the pillow …
Police Forbid Hunting and Gathering in Wake of Hurricane
“You think hunting and gathering is bad?” said one police officer. “Some of these sickos are growingtheir own crops!”Photo by Liv Gilbert In the aftermath of …
Geisel Library Hours Cut to 27 Minutes Per Week
According to a recent report, the number of books being borrowed from the library has remained unaffected.Photo by Liv Gilbert Effective this school year, UC San …
I Walked from Warren to Muir and Ended up in Tijuana
This campus is huge and incredibly confusing to navigate. I’m a first-year student, and nobody told me just how bad it would be when I was …
Convict Escapes from Prison by Completing Sentence
“He walked by the cop and the cop didn’t arrest him,” said local man Hale Mather. “Defund the police.”Photo by Amit Roth Recently, a wave of …
It’s Paranormal, Not Parasocial
I have been getting a lot of rude and judgmental comments from the other townspeople that I really don’t appreciate, so I would just like to …
UCSD Student Uses School Health Insurance
“I’m really glad people are finally starting to use our resources!” said UC Health oozeologist Alexander Dribble. “We’ve seen an ∞% increase from zero to one …
Birch Aquarium to Partner with HDH to Recoup Losses During Renovation
“Some of these fish will kill you, but so would some other dining hall food,” saidFoodworx employee Jade Diaz.Photo by Erica Rosslee This month, Birch Aquarium …
The Internet Has Made Me a Better Person
People can be complicated. How is it that every time I go on TikTok I can’t avoid some random content creator who I’ve never heard of …
Marines Vow to ‘Do Better,’ Apologize to San Diego Community
“Don’t worry, I’m not just teaching the kids the alphabet,” said Sergeant Major Major. “They’re also learning how to liberate oil.”Photo by Jordan Whitlow Last Wednesday, …
