Articles

ArticlesCampusNews

Chancellor Khosla Announces New Evil Department

Written by: Cole Johnson

“Finally, I can pick the greater of two evils,” said one student.Photo by Dylan Schmidt An email sent by Chancellor Pradeep Khosla last Thursday announced that …

ArticlesNationalNews

Las Vegas Consumed by Plague of Moths

Written by: Dylan Schmidt

“I was drawn to it like a moth to a… like a… like… um…” said one moth.Photo by Dylan Schmidt Only a few months after the …

ArticlesOpinionPoint - Counter Point

I Need Coding Help vs What, Like It’s Hard?

Written by: Annelise McCullough

A person’s ability to learn a new language declines after age 12, so why am I, in my early 20s, expected to learn and become fluent …

ArticlesCampusNews

UCSD to Introduce Mini-Triple Rooms

Written by: Naomika Nadkarni

“In this room, my mini fridge looks like a regular fridge,” said Cole Habitation.Photo by Naomika Nadkarni and James Woolley UC San Diego has announced it …

ArticlesNationalNews

Supreme Court Votes to Abolish Retirement

Written by: Ren Wallace

“Too many vacation days? Take a vacation straight to interview hell,” said a representative of the US Department of More Labor.Photo by Julia Wong Last week, …

ArticlesCampusLocalNews

SIO Researchers Discover Godzilla off La Jolla Coast

Written by: Chris Zhang

“I always knew my husband was a snack,” said one grieving spouse.Photo by Destiny Friday On March 11, 2024, Scripps Institute of Oceanography researchers on the …

ArticlesOpinionPoint - Counter Point

We’ve Got to Do Something about This Rat Problem vs There’s No Such Thing as a ‘Rat Problem’

Written by: Dylan Towner

Folks, we’ve gotta do something about this rat problem. I used to not have a problem with the rats. They were harmless at first. Sometimes, when …

ArticlesNews

Coca-Cola Unveils New Ad Campaign to Kill the Polar Bears

Written by: Kaz Nuckowski

“Be the climate change you want to see in the world,” said Chief Marketing Officer Klymat Chang.Photo by Amit Roth Beverage giant Coca-Cola announced in a …

ArticlesCampusNews

HDH Enacts Quarterly Speed Dating Trials

Written by: Sydney Alexander

“The incessant buzzing of the fluorescent lights really sets the mood,” said one student.Photo by James Woolley For the past two quarters, UC San Diego Housing, …

ArticlesCampusNews

Last S Spot Declared UNESCO World Heritage Site

Written by: Janice Kim

“What the hell did the S even stand for?!” said Chancellor Khosla.Photo by Jordan Whitlow Over the course of the last school year, the university’s Parking …