Volume 29 Issue 1

ArticlesLocalNews

Local Horse Opposes Affordable Housing Development in Neighborhood

Written by: Theo Erickson

Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades — two things I’ll be chucking at the affordable houses!” proclaimed the horse.Photo by James Woolley In September …

FeaturesOther Features

Roommate Wanted

Written by: The MQ

$700/month, $5,000 security deposit 30 sqft. 1312 Lain Lane, La Jolla CA, 92122 Seeking roommate to share a 30-squarefoot apartment. No need to buy your own …

Briefs

British Currency Depicts Prince William Instead of King Charles III

Written by: Madeline Mozafari

British Currency Depicts Prince William Instead of King Charles III After the death of Queen Elizabeth II, citizens of the United Kingdom were concerned that they …

ArticlesNews

Pirate Parrots Display “Matey Dance”

Written by: Sharon Roth

“Ahoy,” chirped the parrot, who then declined to give any further comment.Photo By Julia Wong Dr. Perry Keates, ornithologist, has spent the last 15 years studying …

Briefs

Fantasy Football Punishment Ends With Three in Jail

Written by: Farhad Taraporevala

Fantasy Football Punishment Ends With Three in Jail Every September, millions of people participate in fantasy football. For some, the joy comes from drafting their favorite …

Briefs

Cold Fusion Debate Gets Heated

Written by: Everett Ririe

Cold Fusion Debate Gets Heated Cold fusion, a hypothetical type of fusion occurring at room temperature as opposed to the temperature of the sun, is sought …

ArticlesLocalNews

Man Who Has “Never Had COVID” Discovers Devastating News About His “Allergy Flare-up”

Written by: Isabelle Mckelvey

“I finally figured out why none of his COVID tests came back positive. He takes the test tube liquid like a shot,” said Alex.Photo by James …

FeaturesOther Features

Ask Emily Queue – Sports Edition

Written by: The MQ

ArticlesNewsTech

New False Memory Service Helps Users Pad Their Resumes

Written by: Theo Erickson

“This new app really helps me sleep better at night,” attested Laina Lightly. “And not just because I have better job security — my resumé now …

FeaturesOther Features

The MQ’s Guide to the Royal Family

Written by: The MQ