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ArticlesCampusNews

Scripps Institute of Oceanography to Annex Surrounding Beach Homes

Written by: Amit Roth

“Talk about trickle-down economics — my hardwood is ruined!” said one La Jolla resident.Photo by Amit Roth The Scripps Institute of Oceanography (SIO) annex of UC …

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Little Chats With Melvin McQuerey

Written by: The MQ

ArticlesNationalNews

Following Ecological Destruction, Fisherman Fishes for Compliments

Written by: Theo Erickson

“You’re telling me this fertilizer doesn’t make the water grow faster?” asked one fisherman.Photo by Farhad Taraporevala The loose parking brake of an unattended truck full …

Sunday Comics

NEXT!

Written by: Dylan Schmidt

ArticlesCampusNews

Toxic Workplace Environments Perfect for Crop Growth

Written by: Janice Kim

The phrase “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” was found to be one of the most reliable fertilizers.Photo by Jordan Whitlow After world hunger was solved during Summer Session II, the …

Sunday Comics

Meow Tools

Written by: Dylan Towner

ArticlesCampusNews

Sunshine Market Maximizes Convenience by Abolishing the Illusion of Choice

Written by: Abby Offenhauser

“I tried to take the bell pepper out of my basket, and three store employees tackled me,” said shopper Anne Flaxis. “I’m allergic!”Photo by Liv Gilbert …

ArticlesNationalNewsPolitics

Congress Passes Bill Banning Women from Aging

Written by: Erica Rosslee

“Finally, some peace and quiet,” said Mitch McConnell.Photo by Theo Erickson Despite a 75-hour Senate filibuster and a bipartisan coalition against it, Congress succeeded in passing …

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The MQs Course Syllabus

Written by: The MQ

ArticlesEditorialOpinion

I Bet I Could Do Olympic Gymnastics if I Really, Really Wanted To

Written by: Naomika Nadkarni

Another year goes by and another round of Olympic Games has come and gone, and all these damn kids online keep raving about these damn Olympic …