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Coastal Ecosystem Devastated After Gender-Reveal Oil Spill
BP has recently defended the Deepwater Horizon spill, calling it “ahead of its time.”Photo by Jack Yang Several miles of coastal wetland in the San Diego area …
New From the CDC: “Social Distancing Rules Still Apply, Even if You Really Really Need a Hug”
Whittman stated: “These pillows are so fluffy, I might not even go back to people after this.”Photo by Jack Yang In a recent press conference, the Center …
Local Chef Opens Dessert Chain, OnlyFlans
One dissenter said, “Who would go all the way to a store to get desserts? Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for …
Instagram Influencer Predicts the Future by Reading Makeup Smears on Face Masks
“The spirits are telling me you haven’t been following me on Instagram. Would you like my handle?” asked Welch.Photo by Stephen Lightfoot In the age of Instagram …
Molecular Gastronomist Sticks “This Machine Kills Fascists” Sticker on Nitro Foam Maker
“This dish is pretty conceptual, so I wouldn’t be surprised if you didn’t understand it on the first taste,” said Tenshuss.Photo by Stephen Lightfoot Local Restaurateur Pete …
Local Woman’s Cystic Acne “Actually Says Something Really Nice” in Braille
“It’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever spelled out on their face for me,” said Funke. Photo by Jack Yang UC San Diego Freshman Ruby Stone has recently …
Top Ten Institutions More Legitimate Than the Supreme Court
Top Ten Institutions More Legitimate Than the Supreme Court The Burger King Court Infinite monkeys on infinite typewriters Three children in a trench coat trying to …
Compost Bin for Rotting School Newspapers That Nobody Reads Wins Award
Malkie remarked, “Print media may be dead, but composting is very much alive.”Photo by Sharon Roth Last Wednesday, two UCSD undergraduate students were awarded the American Climate …
Area Man Screams “Eat the Rich” From His Maserati
Cist later stated, “I’m an everyman. I’m paying off my $200,000 car month by month just like everyone else.”Photo by Sharon Roth Midday Tuesday, a male student …
