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UCSD Announces Plan for “Giant Space Laser” to Eliminate Bad Weather
Photo by Amit Roth UC San Diego broke ground earlier this week on the construction of the WASTEOFMONEY, or the Weather Augmentation Station That Emits Only …
Furries Don’t Belong at the Met Gala vs Meow
Is this what it’s come to? Furries at the Met Gala? Jabbering in full meow-speak, no less. To her credit, Doja Cat has always been upfront …
Goodyear Blimp Grounded Indefinitely
Photo by Amit Roth Throughout the month of February, several balloons flying over North America were shot down by U.S. fighter pilots. Following these incidents, Goodyear …
How Depleted Uranium Could Solve the World Hunger Crisis
Five years ago, I was walking on a trail through the Yucca Mountains in Nevada when I stumbled upon a dull, grayish-black bar of metal. Having …
TikTok Songs in Dining Halls Make Customers Prone to Involuntary Fits of Dancing
Since late September, reports of involuntary fits of dancing induced by TikTok songs being played on the radio in dining halls have come in at an …
UCSD to Launch New Subscription Based Wifi Service
On Monday, UCSD announced the launch of a new wifi network that will be available to students that purchase a monthly subscription plan. Preorders for the …
I’m the gallon of milk in your fridge you have not touched since week 1
This cold, desolate land has been all I’ve known. When I was chosen by you, I thought I had a chance at a rich, adventurous life. …
Wall Street Grows Tired of Betting Against the Livelihood of Working Class People, Begins Betting Against Working Class’s Lives Directly
Major Wall Street investors and mutual funds have recently begun a new trading strategy. Instead of investments in traditional businesses or commodities, many investors have traded …
In Resolution of Third Strike, 64 Employees Receive Conciliatory Turkey
Photo by Sharon Roth In the spirit of Thanksgiving, HDH and striking 64 degrees employees finally reached a settlement last Thursday. Student employees have had mixed reactions, …
Hark! Welcometh Back to Mine ThouTube Channel
Hark! Welcometh back to mine ThouTube channel. Maketh sure to like, comment, and tell thy bellkeep to ring the bell in the towne square so thou …
