Photo by Amit Roth
Following UC San Diego’s announcement that only one of the Eighth College dorms would house students in Fall 2023, UCSD released a statement revealing the inclusion of quadruple bedrooms in the housing plans. The quadruples, known officially as “mini-quads,” will be located in the same spaces as single or mini-double rooms, and they will primarily house students who were previously on the housing waitlist.
HDH later provided sample layouts for each mini-quad bedroom. “There will be one triple-bunk bed and one bed with a lofted desk, since nobody likes hitting their head on the ceiling first thing in the morning. The other three desks will be stacked, staircase-style, like those videos on YouTube where the guy puts seven children in one bedroom,” said Supercriminal Badmaster, an HDH representative. “But since we’re only putting four people in one room, we’re like, way better. Also, you’ll get really close to each other — access to desk D, the lofted desk, will require climbing the desks corresponding to bed spaces A to C, or developing a sick vertical leap. This will help UCSD students get the most out of dorm living by getting to know their peers very quickly.”
Students voiced criticisms of the university’s decision. “They couldn’t even turn the triples into quads,” said first-year student Imneve Eraloone. “I already live with two other people, and I hate both of them — not to mention that I share my bathroom with 29 strangers, and there’s only four toilets. I was hoping for a single next year, but I’m not even sure they’ll exist.” Second-year student Nott Myprob also shared their thoughts on the change. “I feel bad for the new students,” Myprob said. “I might be in off-campus housing, but at least I get to be alone. Is it even legal to put that many people in one space? I’m pretty sure this has to be violating fire codes.”
Chancellor Khosla later clarified the details of the announcement from a Zoom webinar. “We value our students’ privacy and mental health,” Khosla said. “In accordance, we have elected to eliminate all single bedrooms from UCSD housing by 2024. You can’t be sad and lonely if you’re constantly around other people!” After muting all other participants in the call, Khosla continued, “Additionally, we hope that this change will decrease the strain on CAPS, as each bedroom can be like its own small therapy group. We anticipate exclusively positive responses from residents about the communal nature of our student housing.”
The university also revealed that Eighth College will revise previously-released floor plans, indicating that all double rooms will become triple-occupancy rooms alongside the inclusion of mini-quads. “It will only cost $2,000 per quarter to live in a mini-quad in a residence hall. You’ll share one suite-style bathroom with 15 other bedrooms,” Badmaster said. “Plus, for all apartment spaces, we’re currently looking at a possible renovation to temporarily convert the kitchen into a living space for four people, which will cost $3,500 per quarter. Don’t worry — access to kitchen spaces is available on every floor, and communal laundry spaces will still be available in each building, luxuriously totaling 30 washers and dryers for approximately 7,000 students.” A fourth-year student, Mitch Outtahere, shared their advice for students on the housing waitlist. “You could always just sneak into the construction site for the unfinished Eighth buildings,” Outtahere said. “I’m sure the buildings are basically done, and it’s not like anyone will care. Plus, there won’t be any competition to get a single of your own, and you can rent out your bed to someone way more desperate than you. If they won’t let you live in Sixth, you might as well get the ocean view they advertise so much. You’re paying for it, after all.”
