Top Ten
Top Ten Ways to Seem More Mature
Top Ten Ways to Seem More Mature Tell your friends, “Wow, you’ve grown so much,” everytime you see them Order a black coffee and pretend to …
Top Ten Similarities Between the Senate Floor and the Dance Floor
Top Ten Similarities Between the Senate Floor and the Dance Floor There’s a house whip 😉 Sometimes there are bills on the floor You wish Mitch …
Top Ten Names That Should be Used Instead of Egg Nog
Top Ten Names That Should be Used Instead of Egg Nog Nothing, we shouldn’t even drink it Eggspresso Yoeulk Cockadoodle brew Eggnipotent nog Unidentified white liquid …
Top Ten Ways the Elf on the Shelf Has Ruined Your Life
Top Ten Ways the Elf on the Shelf Has Ruined Your Life Got your son used to a surveillance state Took the Christ out of Christmas …
Top Ten Similarities Between Christmas Dinner and the 2020 Elections
Top Ten Similarities Between Christmas Dinner and the 2020 Elections You didn’t sleep the night before The TV is showing the same stuff for an entire …
Top Ten Things You Almost Forgot About in 2020
Top 10 Things You Almost Forgot About in 2020 The sensation of a lover’s caress The Alamo The apocalyptic boom of a HydroFlask hitting the floor …
Top Ten Ways to Ascend
Top Ten Ways to Ascend Unlock repressed childhood trauma Put on a sweater fresh from the dryer Consume the elusive 3% milk Push every door marked …
Top Ten Forbidden Dining Hall Meals
Top Ten Forbidden Dining Hall Meals Chicken tendrils The Pines Cockroach Salad™ Cough Drop Gushers The ready-to-eat sushi sold at the markets Chocolate cupcake with garlic …
Top Ten Ways to Make Sure Your Vote Gets Counted
Top Ten Ways to Make Sure Your Vote Gets Counted Vote several times just to make sure Ask very nicely Show up in person with no …
Top Ten Things You Forgot Were Outside
Top Ten Things You Forgot Were Outside John Cusack with a boomboxand a trenchcoat Social events you said you were going to go to but never …