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Pluto Violates Subscription Terms, Loses Planetary Status

Written by: Madeline Mozafari

“They ripped me off,” said Jupiter. “I paid for a whole year’s subscription, but they only gave me 365 days.”Photo by Julia Wong When Pluto first …

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Famous Star Canceled for Creating Nuclear Power Plant

Written by: Sharon Roth

“Getting a chance to sit down and talk with the Sun was enlightening,” said one journalist. “They’re not as bright as they seem.”Photo by Sharon Roth …

Briefs

Local Chemist Feels Out Of Her Element

Written by: Sharon Roth

Soon-to-be graduated chemistry major Keren Moth reported an ongoing chemical spill of biologically derived saline solution in Muir College. In her injury report, Moth described the …

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Top Ten Beach Activities

Written by: The MQ

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Professional Sports Have Become Predictable

Written by: Pranav Reddy

What’s the deal with sports these days? When I was a kid, there were still new narratives and new agendas being pushed. We had Michael Jordan …

Skyboxes

Nun Starts New Religion

Written by: The MQ

Prays to Cod

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Top Ten Collectibles

Written by: The MQ

Skyboxes

Sculptor Tries Different Medium

Written by: The MQ

Hardware doesn’t prove hard enough

ArticlesCampusNews

Professors Start Evaluating Students Through New GRADE Program

Written by: Matthew Ware

UC San Diego is currently considering ways to incorporate GRADEs into students’ cumulative GPAs.Photo by Maria Dhilla After experiencing success with the CAPE program, professors have …

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