28.2

Back PageFeatures

The MQ Gets Bought Out in a Hostile Takeover

Written by: The MQ

recently, we were bought out by some awesome, sweet, and superHot businEssmen! and we totally had a say in it! they’ve changed aLmost everything about our paPer in the best way possible! we’re so gratefUl for the sophiSticated new ideas they’ve added to our team! We need to CAPITALIZE on this chance.

ArticlesCampusNews

UCSD Campus Police Crack Down on Post-It Art Returns to Stop and Frisk

Written by: Chiara Ng

“This is a sticky situation, we have to handle it carefully,” Stork explained.Photo by Sharon Roth Many UCSD students took dorm decor to the next level with …

Skyboxes

Pizzeria experiences gas leak

Written by: The MQ

The whole place is flooded with carbonara monoxide

ArticlesCampusNews

UCSD Announces “Bold, Firm” Plan to Decarbonize “by the Time the Earth is Swallowed by the Sun”

Written by: Alex Riensch-Goldstein

“Green energy? Sorry, I don’t see color,” claimed Khosla.Photo by Sharon Roth Following years of pressure by campus climate activists, UCSD admin declared their intention to “fully …

Skyboxes

We couldn’t print a great tit

Written by: The MQ

So here’s a chick with nice legs

ArticlesLocalNews

Disney Announces New LGBT Show, No Queer Characters Planned

Written by: Yuri Bukhradze

One disgruntled viewer complained, “The Bible says Adam and Eve, not Mickey and Donald.”Photo by Yuri Bukhradze In the latest announcement of upcoming Disney+ content, the …

Sunday Comics

Asshole Printer

Written by: System32

Within these pixels, Comic artist System32 exposes fatalistic and capitalistic gall that our printers so flagrantly flaunt, and, through that analysis, they reconcile our existence with these tortuous and frustrating machinations.

ArticlesCampusNews

All Dining Dollars Converted to Triton Cash: Students Feast in Laundry Rooms

Written by: Jeannie Kim

“At least I know my food is clean,” said Lyall.Photo by Jack Yang With understaffing and poor working conditions causing eon-long wait times at dining halls, UCSD …

ArticlesOpinionPoint - Counter Point

What College Are You In? vs. Who Cares?

Written by: Pranav Reddy

Point: You’ll Never Get Ahold of Me Lucky Charms! By Anna Ying First-Year Hi! What college are you in? I’m in Seventh. What’s your major? I’m …

ArticlesCampusNews

UCSD Wins Rights to Build Ninth College Atop Gliderport Parking

Written by: Madeline Mozafari

“I’d be angry with what’s happening right now,” said Byrd, “but the view is so breathtaking I keep on forgetting.”Photo by Sharon Roth In a landmark case …