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OH NO! The MQ is a Scary Movie!

Written by: The MQ

Will we survive? We’re getting really scared, even though we have plot armor. Wait, unless this is one of those edgy kind of horror movies where the genre-savvy characters get killed off for shock value. This movie has to be — shh. Shh!!! Did you hear that? Oh, God, please let this be a regular movie where the virgins survive.

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The MQ Gets Bought Out in a Hostile Takeover

Written by: The MQ

recently, we were bought out by some awesome, sweet, and superHot businEssmen! and we totally had a say in it! they’ve changed aLmost everything about our paPer in the best way possible! we’re so gratefUl for the sophiSticated new ideas they’ve added to our team! We need to CAPITALIZE on this chance.