"I'm not asleep. My mind is alive."
- Joe Biden, President of theUnited States
These are features from the newspaper. Centerspread and Backspread can also be found in their respective pages.
Center Spread • Features
November 1, 2017
Written by: The MQ
Back Page • Features
September 27, 2017
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March 15, 2023
After years of declining viewership, the NCAA announced a shift in their annual March Madness tournament in an effort to “pander to those damn kids.” “It’s …
Playing in the IKEA showroom since 1988.
Throughout the month of February, several balloons flying over North America were shot down by U.S. fighter pilots. Following these incidents, Goodyear announced that their blimp …
Satire that will make you feel something.
Overdipping the chip since 1988.
We just kinda wing it.
The best way to start your day is by opening your eyes.