Local
Suburban Mother Achieves Peak Fighting Physique After Training for Black Friday
After preparing for Black Friday, Richards decided to enroll in another strength training program for Boxing Day.Photo by Jack Yang Pamela Richards, mother of four and self-proclaimed …
SoCal Moms Poison Trees to Capture Fall Aesthetic
Miller shared with reporters: “I have an autumn complexion, so my yard needs one too!”Photo by Jade Coniglio A local Homeowner’s Association has mandated that every …
Manly Flavors Offered for New Male Birth Control
Unlike women’s birth control, this can be purchased over the counter, and at lower prices.Photo by Sharon Roth In an effort to make hormonal birth control options …
Student Pissed-Off That God Gives Meaning of Life Instead of Helping Pass Final
“Fuck God and morality, I just need that A,” said Manson.Photo by Jack Yang Kenneth Manson, formerly an atheist, has recently declared his “hatred for God.” Manson’s …
Man Only Wears Designer “Supreme” Streetwear After Near-God Experience
In response to Lee’s new perspective on life, God said, “Let your wallet be light.”Photo by Sharon Roth Second-year UCSD student Joseph Lee has gained notoriety …
Sorority Girls Experience Near Death on Local Torrey Pines Hike
“If we get out of here alive, I swear we’re gonna take that trip to Spain,” Fillis said to Stutten.Photo by Jay Noonan Sorority sisters Jessica …
Local Pastor Promotes Foot Fetish to Combat Premarital Sex
“Remember to leave a little space for Jesus. And socks. It’s sexier with the socks on anyways,” said Pastor Frietche.Photo by Jack Yang This past Thursday, passing …
La Jolla Playhouse Premiers "Stomp 2", Featuring UCSD’s Custodial Staff
Several audience members paid for a premium package with “splash zone” seating and $80 “Stomp 2” ponchos.Photo by Jack Yang The La Jolla Playhouse recently announced …
Local Student Plans to Hit the Gym Over Summer, Resolution Lasts a Week
“It took me like 10 situps to reach the remote, so I think I’m good for the day,” said Wyland.Photo by Jack Yang Second year Sid …
Local Glass-Breaking Business is a “Smashing Success”
In response to concerns over possible injuries from broken glass, the store owners reassured customers that “there is nothing to worry about. We have a waiver …
