November 1, 2023 Read it and weep profusely. Volume XXX Issue II

Brandon Mougel

Brandon Mougel is an MQ Alumni

ArticlesNews

Investigation Finds Rhode Island Is Not an Island

Written by: Brandon Mougel

The state of Rhode Island was once thought to be the fringe belief by conspiracy theorists and rogue cartographers alike, but enough evidence has been leaked …

ArticlesNews

CBS Greenlights New Series “Young Frasier”

Written by: Brandon Mougel

In the wake of CBS’s smash success “Young Sheldon,” audiences should expect to “hear the blues a-callin again” as the network has confirmed its intention to …

ArticlesNews

Male-Conducted Study Finds One in Five Women Are Victims of an Amazing Joke They Didn’t Get

Written by: Brandon Mougel

Allegations of sexual harassment in the workplace have been on the rise recently as women everywhere have begun to report instances in which they have experienced …

ArticlesNewsPolitics

North Korea in Final Stages of Developing a Photo Bomb

Written by: Brandon Mougel

Yesterday the White House released a press brief stating that “diplomatic friction continues with North Korea, as their government develops an assault on the American lifestyle.” …

ArticlesNewsPolitics

Puerto Rico Chosen for Trump’s “Most Dangerous Game”

Written by: Brandon Mougel

The first few months of the Trump presidency have not been without controversy, and a recently signed executive order has sparked even more conversation surrounding the …

ArticlesNews

Biblical Scholars Find Flood Was Intended to Reward Fish

Written by: Brandon Mougel

Revelations were made earlier this week when scholars found a new reference point for the Old Testament. This awakening was recently discovered by religious scholars when …

ArticlesNews

Legion of Doom Mourns Fidel Castro, Florence Henderson

Written by: Brandon Mougel

Meanwhile, at the Hall of Doom, the recent passing of both Cuban dictator Fidel Castro and the Matriarch of “The Brady Bunch,” Florence Henderson, came as …

ArticlesLocalNews

Amish Community Saddened and Very Confused by Cyberbullying Epidemic

Written by: Brandon Mougel

Surprising new advocates in the fight against cyberbullying have emerged in recent weeks: the Amish. Candle shops and haberdasheries alike have been abuzz with the news …

ArticlesNewsPolitics

400 Million Dollars Sent to Haiti to Aid Cholera Outbreak; Fiji Water Plant Built

Written by: Brandon Mougel

In an act of incredible generosity, the United Nations (U.N.) has sent 400 million dollars to aid in the cholera outbreak in Haiti, which coincidentally began …

ArticlesNewsPolitics

Donald Trump Plans to Hire Dick Wolf to Implement Law & Order Policy

Written by: Brandon Mougel

Handwritten notes found on Trump’s podium by Hofstra University janitor Philipe Santana after the first Presidential Debate seem to indicate who Trump has decided to hire …