Top Ten Reasons Why OxiClean Couldn’t Quite Get That Stain Out

Top Ten

Written by: The MQ

  1. You still haven’t made your five easy payments of $9.95
  2. It’s not a stain; it’s modern art. Please sir, you’re at the MOMA, get out
  3. OxiClean only gets the tough stains. It was a soft stain
  4. The stain your mother was referring to on the family lineage was more metaphorical
  5. You bought OxyMoron Clean and it’s actually making it dirtier
  6. The stain is on your soul. God’s watching
  7. You didn’t read the box. It works on everything but meatball stains
  8. You can remove the stain, but you can never remove its spirit
  9. Stained glass is dry clean only
  10. “Oh shit, that’s just the color this is”

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