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Roommate Wanted
$700/month, $5,000 security deposit 30 sqft. 1312 Lain Lane, La Jolla CA, 92122 Seeking roommate to share a 30-squarefoot apartment. No need to buy your own …
British Currency Depicts Prince William Instead of King Charles III
British Currency Depicts Prince William Instead of King Charles III After the death of Queen Elizabeth II, citizens of the United Kingdom were concerned that they …
Pirate Parrots Display “Matey Dance”
“Ahoy,” chirped the parrot, who then declined to give any further comment.Photo By Julia Wong Dr. Perry Keates, ornithologist, has spent the last 15 years studying …
Fantasy Football Punishment Ends With Three in Jail
Fantasy Football Punishment Ends With Three in Jail Every September, millions of people participate in fantasy football. For some, the joy comes from drafting their favorite …
Man Who Has “Never Had COVID” Discovers Devastating News About His “Allergy Flare-up”
“I finally figured out why none of his COVID tests came back positive. He takes the test tube liquid like a shot,” said Alex.Photo by James …
Cold Fusion Debate Gets Heated
Cold Fusion Debate Gets Heated Cold fusion, a hypothetical type of fusion occurring at room temperature as opposed to the temperature of the sun, is sought …
AI-Generated Images to Replace All Art Ever by 2024
“If I had to describe the type of art I’m making, I would say I’m in my RGB period,” said Hugh Mann.Photo by Julia Wong Last …
New False Memory Service Helps Users Pad Their Resumes
“This new app really helps me sleep better at night,” attested Laina Lightly. “And not just because I have better job security — my resumé now …
Khosla Announces Partnership with Saudi Arabia to Bring “The Segment” to UCSD Campus
“Mr. Khosla, tear down this wall!” cried Helsing.Photo by Gary Ficks Over the past year, UCSD has promised to increase its housing supply in an attempt …