Articles
Amazon and Boeing Announce Joint Microtransit Venture
“Still beats flying with United,” said Ahsoak Ingwethi.Photo by Farhad Taraporevala Jeff Bezos was flown to the stage by three drones to announce his latest venture, …
I Am the Hydro Flask That Falls in Your Lecture
I hear people have been complaining about the occasional, small, itty-bitty noise that I make when I fall in your 8 a.m. lecture (it’s not like …
US Military Tours Homeless Encampments for Career Exploration
This is an interesting conundrum,” said a member of the middle class. “I respect the troops, but I hate the homeless.”Photo by Jordan Whitlow This past …
Rising Sea Levels to Extinguish Forest Fires
“Californians were happy that they had no more forest fires — before they all drowned,” said Future Senator Petrol G. Ascot.Photo by Julia Wong Chaos broke …
UCSD to Introduce Mini-Triple Rooms
“In this room, my mini fridge looks like a regular fridge,” said Cole Habitation.Photo by Naomika Nadkarni and James Woolley UC San Diego has announced it …
Supreme Court Votes to Abolish Retirement
“Too many vacation days? Take a vacation straight to interview hell,” said a representative of the US Department of More Labor.Photo by Julia Wong Last week, …
SIO Researchers Discover Godzilla off La Jolla Coast
“I always knew my husband was a snack,” said one grieving spouse.Photo by Destiny Friday On March 11, 2024, Scripps Institute of Oceanography researchers on the …
We’ve Got to Do Something about This Rat Problem vs There’s No Such Thing as a ‘Rat Problem’
Folks, we’ve gotta do something about this rat problem. I used to not have a problem with the rats. They were harmless at first. Sometimes, when …
Coca-Cola Unveils New Ad Campaign to Kill the Polar Bears
“Be the climate change you want to see in the world,” said Chief Marketing Officer Klymat Chang.Photo by Amit Roth Beverage giant Coca-Cola announced in a …
HDH Enacts Quarterly Speed Dating Trials
“The incessant buzzing of the fluorescent lights really sets the mood,” said one student.Photo by James Woolley For the past two quarters, UC San Diego Housing, …
